On the 23rd anniversary of the great Bobby Moore’s death – on 24th February, 1993 – here’s an attempt to capture the spirit not only of one of England’s greatest players but also one of its most stylish icons.

Let’s crack on, shall we? (Hover over images to read the caption)

This picture won’t be far from any Moore retrospective. English football’s finest hour and Moore’s greatest day, but the popularity of this picture doesn’t just emanate from the event itself.

It’s that image of the captain, the leader, held aloft by his team mates and the look of sheer joy on his face that arrests the gaze.

West Ham was Moore’s club side, and his name is still revered by Hammers fans.

This picture of him in action in 1967 at Upton Park shows him rising above a shocking surface, totally focused and with not a hair out of place.

Many who saw the game in which Moore went up against Pele in the 1970 World Cup describe the England captain’s performance as one of the finest they’d ever seen.

Here’s Moore in action on that sweltering day.

Long before Posh and Becks there was Booby and Tina Moore.

This picture was taken by the famous photographer Terry O’Neil in 1972 and is very much of its time.

Moore and West Ham and England colleague Martin Peters out walking in the London suburbs, displaying an effortless, timeless style.

It looked cool back then, and it still looks cool today.

Suggested further reading…

12 Brilliant Photos Of The Young Bobby Moore
Fulham Sign George Best And Rodney Marsh To Play Alongside Bobby Moore
Bobby Moore: A Life In Photos

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

Photos: Getty Images/Billy Stickland/Mark Leech

The year was 1990. Michael Bolton ruled the pop charts, Texas Chainsaw Massacre III was entertaining families at cinemas the world over and Maggie Thatcher endeared herself to a nation by introducing the Poll Tax. It truly was a fine old time to be alive.

As far as football was concerned, there was but one name worth knowing: a masculine young(ish) hunk who was dazzling in the colours of the Republic of Ireland despite clearly being born, raised and sculpted in Barnsley. His name was Michael McCarthy.

Euro ’92 qualifier. Lansdowne Road. England were the opponents. Ireland win a free-kick on the half-way line. Mick takes a moment to assess his options before deciding the goal is definitely within his Herculean range…

Such strength. Such poise. Such control.

We’re fully convinced Mick could throw a kettle over a pub if he wanted.

(Via Balls.ie)

The 29th February only comes around once every four years, so it was perhaps fitting that on this day in 2004 an even more unusual occurrence befell Middlesbrough.

Indeed, the Teesside club won the very first major honour in their 128-year history by beating Bolton Wanderers in the League Cup final.

The match, played at Cardiff’s Millenium Stadium, saw Boro quickly haul themselves in front in the second minute of the match as Joseph-Desire Job turned in a Boudewijn Zenden cross.

Five minutes later it was Zenden who double the lead, just about converting a penalty after slipping at the crucial moment. And with that, Boro had completed their scoring within the first seven minutes.

Kevin Davies pulled one back for Bolton in the 21st minute, but Boro held out for what seemed like an age to eventually secure the 2-1 win.

That helped ease the pain of Boro’s previous closest glimpse of the League Cup trophy. They made the final in 1997 only to concede a 118th-minute equaliser to Leicester City (Emile Heskey doing the honours) before losing the replay 1-0.

Given that Boro are still waiting to add to their honours list 12 years on from their 2004 triumph, February’s elusive 29th day will surely bring back happy memories.

Here’s the Bolton final, as called by the late, great Ali Brownlee…

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

Giggs in 1991, back when the world was still black and white

It was on this day, a quarter of a century ago that a gangly 17-year-old whippet called Ryan Giggs made his first team debut for Manchester United.

The opponents at Old Trafford were Everton and the Reds went on to lose 2-0. An inauspicious start perhaps, but things didn’t turn out too badly for Giggsy in the end.

By the time he retired in 2014, he’d made 672 senior appearances for United, scoring 114 goals. Along the way he’d collected winners medals for 13 Premier League titles, four FA Cups, three League Cups, two Champions Leagues, a World Club Cup, an Intercontinental Cup, a UEFA Super Cup and nine Community Shields.

That haul makes him the most decorated footballer in history. Bizarrely, this suit also has the exact same effect…

He also won two consecutive PFA Young Player of the Year awards, the first player to do so, and is the only player to appear in every one of the first 22 seasons of the Premier League. That’s one of those annoying made-up modern football achievements, I’ll grant you, but it’s still pretty impressive.

He’s also – pub quiz compilers take note – the player with the record for most assists in Premier League history – 271, if you’re interested.

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

“We all read the newspapers”

Never the most technically adept striker, John Fashanu tended to make up for any shortcomings in finesse by what’s known in the trade as ‘putting it about a bit’.

A deeply cerebral and spiritual man, Fashanu sought to intellectualise his lumpen style by kidding himself that his violently-chucked elbows were a staunch element of his profound martial arts expertise.

Make no mistake, here was a man who could defend himself.

Here he is at some point in the mid 1990s, discussing his black belt prowess in detail…

What a plum. The man truly is a parody of himself.

We suggest you ask Gary Mabbutt if Fash truly was a zen-like master Judokan out there on the pitch.

Awooga, indeed.

Fulham new boys (left-right) Bobby Moore, Flemming Hanssen and Alan Mullery, July 1974

It was on the 8th March, 1974 that West Ham reluctantly transfer-listed the greatest player in the club’s history – Bobby Moore.

Aged 32, the great man informed the club he fancied a new challenge after 18 years at the Hammers, and would eventually move to across the capital to Fulham.

Then-West Ham manager Ron Greenwood said at the time: “’Grateful’ is hardly the word for what he has done for this club and football.”

After three years at the Cottage, Moore spent a two-year stint in North America before finally bowing out with nine appearances for newly-professional Danish side Herning Fremad (the club that eventually went on to evolve into FC Midtjylland) in 1978.

Bobby Moore models his new Herning Fremad strip, 1978 (Photo: HF.dk)

It’s always a sad moment when a club legend moseys off into the sunset, with both mixed feelings and mixed results coming in the wake of some famous departures over the years.

Dave Mackay was without doubt one of the greatest players ever to play for Tottenham, but in 1968 the club decided his career had run its course and he was transferred to Derby County for £5,000.

He was signed by the management team of Brian Clough and Peter Taylor, and helped Derby win promotion to the first division, scooping the Footballer of the Year title as well.

In 1974-75, he returned to manage Derby to the league title.

Tottenham legend Dave Mackay, circa 1970 (Photo: PA)

Clough had also wanted to sign another great player that Spurs felt was surplus to requirements – one Jimmy Greaves.

However, Cockney lad Greaves, who didn’t want to leave Spurs and certainly didn’t want to leave London, ended up going to West Ham as part of a deal that brought Martin Peters to White Hart Lane.

In more modern times, Raul’s departure from Real Madrid came as a shock to many who simply assumed the poacher extraordinaire would end his playing days with the club where he started out.

Aged 33, Raul had suffered from a cavalcade of injuries in what turned out to be his final season at the Bernabeu, so those fans devastated to see The Angel of Madrid departing in 2010 were at least able to console themselves in the fact that he probably wouldn’t make much of an impact anywhere else.

But such was his impact at Schalke 04 that when he finally called time on his playing days in Europe, the German side retired his No. 7 shirt for three years in tribute.

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

Malcolm ‘Supermac’ MacDonald scores the winning goal for Newcastle during their FA Cup 6th round, second replay against Forest, March 1974

As the football authorities continue to ponder whether to sound the death knell for cup replays altogether, it’s perhaps timely to remember one of the most controversial FA Cup replays in football history.

In March 1974, Newcastle United and Nottingham Forest played each other in the sixth round of the FA Cup.

The first match took place on 9th March and Forest won a hotly contested penalty. They scored to take a 3-1 lead, but the Toon’s Pat Howard was sent off for protesting.

That prompted the crowd at St James’ Park to invade the pitch, forcing an eight-minute break as the referee removed the players for their own safety.

When play resumed, Newcastle scored three goals to win 4-3. Forest were incensed, and appealed against the result. The FA decided they had a point, annulled the result and ordered a replay at a neutral venue.

Newcastle were now incensed. Especially as their booking and sending off were allowed to stand while the result wasn’t.

The replay took place at Goodison Park and, somewhat inevitably, turned out to be a draw.

As such, a replay of the replay subsequently took place at Goodison again – with Newcastle eventually running out winners thanks to a winner from Malcolm MacDonald (picture above).

Many Forest fans still haven’t forgiven the Geordie fans for their poor conduct on that fateful day.

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

Photo: Press Association

On 10th March 1971, Cardiff City pulled off one of the greatest results in their history, and one of the biggest upsets in the entire football pantheon, when they beat Real Madrid by a single goal to nil.

Riding high in Europe after becoming the first non-top flight club to reach the semi-finals of the Cup Winner’s Cup in 1968, the Bluebirds’ ’71 vintage went on to achieve something perhaps even more special against Los Blancos’ star-studded side.

It was Brian Clark who proved the difference by ramming home a header in the 31st minute to score the only goal of the game – his immortality duly sealed.

Sadly the euphoria didn’t last too long. Real proved too powerful in the return game at the Bernabeu, winning 2-0 to advance to the semis before eventually losing against Chelsea in the final.

Still, Cardiff will always have that glorious, glorious first leg to look back on…

Which all-in-all got us thinking about upsets in general.

Indeed, here’s five more favourites…

A personal favourite, if only for the look on the bookie’s face as I collected my £120 winnings after having a cheeky punt on the game, was Cameroon’s 1-0 win over Argentina in the opening game of the 1990 World Cup.

Happy days in a glorious summer of football, with Cameroon’s Omam-Biyik (pictured below taking on Señor Diego Maradona) scoring the goal and writing himself into the history books. It wasn’t a bad tournament overall, if I remember correctly.

There’s always a Scottish angle to these shock defeat pieces, and Celtic oblige us this time with memories of the day they lost a Champions League tie to a team that sounded like an Eastern European night class offered at a local college.

Slovakian champions Artmedia Petrzalka didn’t have many Celtic fans too worried when they came out of the hat in the competition’s second preliminary round.

After they rollicked the Hoops 5-0 out in Bratislava, Celtic fans were left softly weeping into their Special Brew.

They still talk of the day during the 1966 World Cup when, at Ayresome Park, North Korea won their only game of the tournament against mighty Italy to send the Azzurri packing.

Pak Doo Ik got the winner, and picked up a new car for his efforts from the government when he returned home. Italy’s players received eggs and tomatoes from their irate fans.

In the summer of 2002, the French national side were reigning World Cup, European Championship and Confederations Cup champions.

The omni-champs faced little ol’ Senegal in the opening game of the 2002 World Cup. And lost.

Papa Bouba Diop scored the only goal after 30 minutes as France’s aura of invincibility quickly dissolved into the ether.

Perhaps the most unlikely of unlikely stories was the success of Hungarian side Videoton in 1985.

(If at this juncture you were to pipe up that the club was originally founded as Székesfehérvári Vadásztölténygyár SK then you’d be right, but that’s easy for you to say)

The point here is that they came from seemingly nowhere to reach the 1985 UEFA Cup final, beating PSG, Manchester United and FC Partizan on the way before losing to Real Madrid 3-0.

The Hungary Hippos (not their official nickname) promptly vanished from the continental scene for a while thereafter but, in recent years, have begun to re-establish themselves again.

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

Pele has decided to clear out a bit of space in his loft and as such a whole treasure trove of the legendary Brazil striker’s personal mementos are about to come up for sale.

The pristine collection, put together by Julian’s Auctioneers, is comprised of almost 2,000 separate items.

Included are Pele’s own personal Jules Rimet Trophy, two of his gold World Cup Winner’s Medals from 1958 and 1970 and even a makeshift ball (made from rolled-up socks) that O Rei used to hoof around the streets as a child.

Photo: Julien’s/REX/Shutterstock (via Telegraph)

Other items include a pair of Puma boots worn by Pele during the 1970s, several of his old shirts, the ball with which he scored his 1,000th career goal and the accompanying crown he was presented with after doing so.

Learn about our historic Pelé: The Collection auction event in London in June! https://t.co/FTHGuYn7B8 #PeléAuction pic.twitter.com/tOoUkjz6rc

— Juliens Auctions (@JuliensAuctions) March 10, 2016

The Jules Rimet replica is the most expensive lot in the collection with an estimated guide price of between £280,000 to £420,000.

The World Cup medals are expected to fetch around £140,000 a pop when the whole shebang goes up for sale in London in early June.

Come grab yourself a bargain!

Pies are definitely on the lookout for something in the £5 to £20 price bracket.

Jack Charlton of Leeds, circa 1970 (Photo: Press Association)

On this very day, 11th March, back in 1972, the hardnut’s hardnut Jack Charlton played his 600th game for Leeds United.

He went on to make a total of 629 league appearances for Leeds and 762 overall. Both tallies are club records that will probably stand forever.

As well as being tougher than old boots, Charlton the elder was loyal down to the soil – a proud one-club man.

He joined Leeds as a 17-year-old trainee (after deciding not to pursue a career with the police) in 1950 and left a wizened 38-year-old veteran in 1973.

On the day of his 600th game, he received a snazzy clock from club captain Billy Bremner in return for his years of hard graft.

While the likes of Jamie Carragher (737 games for Liverpool), Matthew Le Tissier (16 years at Southampton), Tony Adams (672 games for Arsenal) and Ledley King (321 games for Tottenham) have proved in relatively recent years that one-club loyalty does still exist in the English game, their respective efforts all fall short of the record holder.

We are of course talking about the great John Trollope (father of Paul), who turned out 770 times for Swindon Town between 1960 and 1980. Indeed, Trollope served at Swindon in various roles for over 40 years, even managing the side for a few seasons in the early 1980s.

Even so, Trollope’s longevity pales once compared to the longest-serving one-club man in the world game, with legendary Odense goalkeeper Lars Høgh making close to 850 appearances for the Danish club between 1977 and 2000.

How about that for dedication to the cause?

Suggested further viewing…

19 Cracking Photos Of Jack Charlton In His Pomp 

In 1973, Pele was the international football superstar. So imagine the excited fervour when his employers, Santos, embarked on a friendly tour of Britain.

In March that year, Santos played friendlies at Fulham’s Craven Cottage (Mr Nascimento can be seen signing autographs before that game, above) and Plymouth Argyle’s humble abode at Home Park.

It wasn’t the first time the club had appeared in Britain, as Pele’s stardom and the team’s success gave the club’s directors a chance to cash in with international tours that would generate more than Santos’ modest stadium could ever hope to.

Between May and July 1959, Santos played 22 matches in eight countries. By 1962, the travelling circus reached England, with Santos taking on Sheffield Wednesday at Hillsborough in front of 50,000 fans.

They returned in 1969 to play Stoke City, and again in 1972, when they took on Aston Villa and then Wednesday again in a game played at 2.30pm on a Wednesday afternoon because of energy restrictions caused by the ongoing miners’ strikes.

Pele’s final appearances on English soil came in those aforementioned games in March of 1973, but the Plymouth game almost didn’t happen.

A crowd of almost 40,000 turned up, prompting the ‘entrepreneurial’ Santos directors to ask for another £2,500 or their boys wouldn’t be taking to the pitch.

Plymouth had little choice but to cough up. They won 3-2, and treated their Brazilian guests to a lavish post-match reception.

The Gaurdian’s Hugh McIlvanney was not impressed, observing that “Santos turned the greatest player in the world into a footballing busker”.

Here’s a little archive footage of Pele’s big night out in Plymouth…

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

Back in the 1970s, Johan Neeskens was one of the coolest cats on the planet.

The lithe Dutch midfielder mixed steel and silk in equal measure and had already won all there was to win at club and European level with Ajax before he signed for Barcelona in 1974, reuniting with Johan Cruyff and Rinus Michels in the process.

While the next five years proved relatively unsuccessful for Barca, Neeskens quickly became a nailed-on fans’ favourite.

However, it all came to a fairly abrupt end in 1979, when Neeskens, still only 29 at the time, moved on to New York Cosmos with precious little fanfare.

In a new book entitled Barca Inèdit (‘Barca Unpublished’), it’s alleged that Neeskens was moved on by Barca president Jose Luis Nunez for the strangest and most petty of reasons.

Indeed, it’s purported that Neeskens was given the elbow after he refused to pass Nunez a roll of toilet paper under the stall at the Rico Perez stadium in Alicante.

Incensed by the lack of respect, Nunez vowed there and then to sell Neeskens at the next available opportunity.

That was in 1978. By 1979, he was gone. Dumped, so to speak.

So sad that it all had to end on a bum note.

Football loves a good quarrel, and way back in 1892 – on 15th March in fact – one such disagreement led to the formation of a new football club in the north west of England.

The club was called Everton Athletic. These days, slightly confusingly, it’s called Liverpool FC.

At the epicentre of the row was John Houlding, president of Everton FC. Houlding’s boys were one of the football league’s founder members and had even won the title in 1891.

Everton spent the first few years of their existence playing in a flat corner of Stanley Park up until 1884 when Houlding negotiated the lease of a football ground at Anfield Road. The following year he bought the ground outright, which meant that Everton had to now pay rent to their own president.

In 1890, Houlding decided to raise that rent. By 150%.

It’s the sort of thing that would spark a walk-out these days and it didn’t go down overly well back either. In April 1892, Everton played their final match at Anfield before upping sticks and moving 971 metres back across Stanley Park to their new home at Goodison Park, one of the world’s first purpose-built football grounds.

Everton’s Goodison Park, as it looked in 1905 (Photo: Press Association)

Suddenly stuck without a football team to play at Anfield, Houlding created Everton Athletic. His aim was to take over the mantle of the original Everton but the Football League turned down his application and ordered him to rename his nascent club.

He settled on Liverpool FC and the rest, as they say, is 123 years of history.

Suggested further viewing…

Spiffing Vintage Photos Of Everton’s Goodison Park Between 1905-1968

Scenes of the carnage amid the Battle of Bramall Lane, 2002

This week some 14 years ago, the First Division match between Sheffield United and West Brom was abandoned with the away side leading 3-0.

The reason? There were only six Blades players left on the pitch.

United found themselves a man light after just nine minutes when goalkeeper Simon Tracey was sent-off for handling the ball outside the area. West Brom then scored a couple of goals before, around the hour mark, things began to get nasty – disgracefully so, in fact.

Georges Santos saw red (a little over a minute after coming on as a 64th-minute substitute) for a reckless tackle on Baggies midfielder Andy Johnson. Amid the ensuing brawl, Blades striker Patrick Suffo was dismissed for a head-butt, against just a few minutes after coming on as a sub.

The home side were then forced to watch on as two more of their players leave the pitch with injuries meaning that, with all subs used, United had one less player than the minimum seven required under FA rule. So, with eight minutes left to play, the ref had no option but to call the game off.

United were fined £10,000 and the result was allowed to stand. Both Santos and Suffo never played for the club again.

Here’s another quadruplet of scuttled football matches for your reading pleasure…

The Oldham Athletic team, circa 1910

Oldham Athletic were challenging for the title when they took on Middlesbrough at Ayresome Park on Easter Saturday, 1915.

However, a series of refereeing decisions they viewed as questionable soon had the visitors riled up. When Oldham’s Billy Cook conceded a penalty, the resulting spot-kick put ‘Boro 4-1 up. Soon after, Cook was booked again and sent off. But he refused to leave the field so the referee abandoned the game and took the teams off the pitch.

The result was allowed to stand. Cook received a 12-month ban.

* * * * *

In 1972, Gillingham missed a train from Euston that would have got them to Barrow (some 170 miles away) in good time for the early 5.15pm kick-off needed to circumvent the fact that Barrow’s home ground didn’t have any floodlights.

After an arduous (and further delayed) journey made by plane and car, the Gills arrived in time to kick off 15 minutes late. By the 76th minute, Barrow were 7-0 up but it became too dark to continue and the game was duly abandoned.

Mercifully for the home side, the result was allowed to stand.

* * * * *

As if it were scripted, former Manchester United hero Denis Law back-heeled home a goal for rivals Manchester City that sent the Reds tumbling down to Division Two in 1974.

However, regardless of Law’s impudence, United would have still been relegated had the game ended goalless. Unaware of their fate being sealed by results elsewhere, United’s fans poured onto the pitch in the 85th minute in a desperate effort to get the match abandoned.

The game was, in fact, called off, but the Football League allowed the result to stand. United were down.

* * * * *

In 2014/15, Blackpool endured a terrible season. Off-field chaos led to poor results on it, with the club failing to win away all season.

They were the first club in any division that season to be relegated, and by the time of the last home game against Huddersfield Town on 2nd May, their beleaguered fans had had just about enough.

Shortly after half-time, hundreds ran onto the pitch protesting about the club’s owners. The match was abandoned but the result (0-0) allowed to stand.

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

It all started 128 years ago today. On 22nd March 1888, the Football League was formed – the first such league competition in world football.

It was the top of the football hierarchy in England until 1992, when the top 22 clubs broke away to form the Premier League. The jury’s still out on that decision.

England’s original premier football competition was founded by a Scotsman, Mr William McGregor, who was a director of Aston Villa at the time. That’s him in the picture up there, stationed outside Villa’s ground. Well, not him – a statue of him, you understand?

McGregor got the ball rolling (almost literally) by writing and sending a letter to four other clubs on the second day of March, 1888.

The Villa director wrote to Blackburn Rovers, Bolton Wanderers, Preston North End and West Brom to tell them about his grand scheme for an organised football division.

I beg to tender the following suggestion that ten or twelve of the most prominent clubs in England combine to arrange home-and-away fixtures each season.

Three weeks later, a meeting was held at Anderton’s Hotel in London to discuss the plans. A further meeting on 17th April at the Royal Hotel in Manchester saw the name ‘The Football League’ agreed upon by all parties.

McGregor’s Villa were indeed among the 12 founding clubs that kicked off the inaugural season on 8th September.  The others were Accrington, Blackburn, Bolton, Burnley, Derby County, Everton, Notts County, Preston, Stoke City, West Brom and Wolves.

As for the final standings, this first ever hand-drawn table shows the unbeaten Preston ending the 132-game campaign top of the pile while Stoke brought up the rear…

Image: Football League

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

“Think we’re going to have to call it off, lads…”

Little old Newport County don’t often get a mention in these parts, so we’re taking the opportunity to remember a couple of odd occurrences at the team’s Somerton Park ground in the early-to-mid 20th Century.

The first we’re going to bring up came on Good Friday (23rd March, to be specific) in 1951. County had raced into a commanding 5-1 lead over second-placed Norwich City in a top-of-the-table clash in the old Division Three South. The two points were in the bag.

However, with 15 minutes left to play, Norwich defender Reg Foulkes injured himself while heading a rain-sodden football and the referee decided there and then to abandon the match altogether.

Suffice to say, the home fans were not happy. The ref had to be smuggled out of the ground disguised as an ambulance man. The match was then replayed the following month and drawn 1-1.

A little over 25 years before, the Newport crowd managed to exert its collective influence on another ref who decided in his wisdom to abandon a game mid-match.

It was the first time any such thing had happened at Somerton Park. It was a cold, stark afternoon in November of 1923 and Queens Park Rangers were the visitors to South Wales.

On the morning before kick off, a thick fog descended over the pitch, but the ref decided to press ahead regardless. After just a few minutes, with visibility less than 20 yards, he took both teams off the pitch.

According to press reports, the crowd “expressed forcible criticism” to this decision so the official, to use the common vernacular, bottled it and resumed play.

Both teams scored, with only the fans right on the goal line able to see the ball hit the back of the net.

The match was finally properly abandoned 40 minutes later as the fog was became so thick the two teams may as well have been playing badminton.

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

Stockport County team, circa 1947 (Photo: Hedge Grower)

Sit tight, this may take some time. When Stockport County met Doncaster Rovers in a replay of a Division Three North Cup tie at Stockport’s Edgeley Park on 30th March 1946, the game lasted THREE HOURS AND 23 MINUTES.

By the time the first 90 minutes had elapsed, the teams were drawing 2-2. After another 30 minutes of extra time, the score had not altered.

Competition rules meant that the game then entered a golden goal period, i.e, the first team to score would be crowned winners. You can probably guess what happened, or more accurately what didn’t happen, next.

Indeed, both teams failed to trouble the goalmouth as the match dragged on, and on, and on, and on. Local legend has it that some spectators even went home for their tea and came back to find the game still in progress.

The match was eventually called off at 7pm, after 203 minutes, because it was too dark to play. Floodlights would not come to Edgeley Park for another 10 years. The tie went to a second replay, which Doncaster won 4-0 in 90 minutes. A blessed relief to all in the crowd, presumably.

However, the 203-minute match remains a world record for a competitive game.

Several football marathons have been staged and given recognition in the Guinness Book of Records as the longest game over the years, but the Stockport-Doncaster game remains the record for a scheduled, competitive game as far as we’ve been able to uncover.

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

Crystal Palace ‘keeper Charlie Bumstead dives in vain as Millwall score at The Den, 1951

A crowd of 37,774 turned out for the Fourth Division clash between Crystal Palace and Millwall at Selhurst Park on 31st March 1961 – a figure that remains the record attendance for the fourth tier of English football.

Attendance was helped by the fact the game was a Good Friday bank holiday fixture, and by the fact that Palace versus Millwall is the game that probably has the strongest claim to be the one true South London derby. Millwall won 2-0, but Palace went on to clinch promotion.

In fact, no less than four teams can lay decent claim to participating in the South London derby: Palace, Millwall, Charlton Athletic and Wimbledon.

However, Palace-Millwall is the oldest rivalry, dating back to 1906, and has been played the most often – a total of 132 times.

Millwall Athletic, as they were way back then, are the oldest team of the four, having been formed in 1885, 20 years before Palace and the Addicks.

The first competitive game between Millwall and Palace came on 17th November 1906 in the Southern League. Palace won 3-0 in a game played at the Crystal Palace National Sports Centre, but with Millwall still based in East London, the game was not yet the South London Derby. The Lions then relocated to New Cross in South London in 1910.

The first South London Derby actually staged in South London was played on 31st October 1910. A crowd of 3,000 saw Millwall lose 3-0 to Palace at The Den in a game played for the London PFA Charity Fund.

The first derby in the Football League came on 15th January 1921 in the Third Division South. Again played at The Den, this time before a crowd of 20,000, Palace won 1-0. The Eagles also won the return fixture a week later, by three goals to two.

Despite the early dominance of Palace, it’s Millwall who have the most success in games between the sides. The Lions have won 50 derbies to the Eagles’ 45. Games, such as the match pictured above at The Den in 1951, regularly attracted big crowds.

But in the complex and tight knit geography of South London, seeking to class Palace and Millwall as the definite biggest rivalry risks courting controversy.

Charlton and Millwall are separated by just four miles in South East London and contest a fierce derby of their own. Fans of both teams are fond of trotting out the line that Palace in fact hail from Kent due to the county’s ancient boundary running through the area.

A typical Millwall fan, seen here engaging in a tribal ritual of some description

In a survey carried out in 2012, fan attitudes further muddied the waters. Here, as briefly as possible, is how the land was found to lie:

Charlton see Palace as their main rival, ahead of Millwall, while Palace hate Brighton the most, ahead of Millwall. Millwall fans really don’t like West Ham either, placing that rivalry above the one with Palace.

AFC Wimbledon fans reserve their main ire for MK Dons, for reasons well-documented elsewhere, but have little time for Palace either.

Got that? We’re glad somebody does.

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

Glenn Hoddle’s managerial career began on 4th April 1991, when he was appointed player-manager of Swindon Town at the age of 34.

He replaced another Tottenham legend at the helm, stepping into the void after Ossie Ardilles left to take over at Newcastle.

The Robins were in deep trouble in Division Two at the time, still reeling from a financial scandal which had seen them stripped of promotion to the First Division in 1990 (they admitted 36 charges of breaching league rules, 35 of which pertained to illegal payments made to players).

The club was 17th when Hoddle took over, and he just about managed to keep them up by washing up two points above the drop zone.

By 1993, Hoddle’s team were at Wembley for the play-off final, and Hoddle’s first stint as a player-manager was making people sit up and take notice.

He tried to mould the team in his image, coercing them into playing with the kind of fluid, attacking style he was famous for as a player. Swindon, unlikely as it may seem, were gaining a reputation as entertainers.

At the end of 1992/93 season, Hoddle’s mob beat Leicester City 4-3 in the play-off final to win promotion to the nascent Premier League, Hoddle himself scoring the first goal of the game.

Just days later, he accepted an offer to manage Chelsea.

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com

On 8th April 1988, Southampton’s prized young gem, a spindly blonde urchin by the name of Alan Shearer, opened his senior goal-scoring account in style.

At the tender age of 17 years and 240 days, Shearer got things under way with a hat-trick against Arsenal at The Dell and, in doing so, became the youngest player to score a hat-trick in the top flight of English football.

The picture above shows 15-year-old Shearer shortly after he’d signed for the south coast club.

The rest of Shearer’s career didn’t pan out too badly either. In fact, he went on to score 11 Premier league hat-tricks – still a record to this day.

He also scored the most goals in a 42-game season (34 in 1994/95, held jointly with Andy Cole) and the most goals in a 38-game season (31 in 1995/96).

For Southampton, he scored 43 goals in 158 appearances, but really made his mark at Blackburn and boyhood team Newcastle, for whom he is the highest goalscorer in club history, with 206 goals.

Shearer finished up with a monumental 260 Premier League goals to his name, almost 70 goals ahead of the second-highest scorer on the all-time list: Wayne Rooney with 192.

Here’s just a small selection of Shearer’s aforementioned haul, complete with the obligatory thumping Euro techno mawkish mid-2000s dirge-rock soundtrack…

You can follow Martin Cloake on Twitter at @MartinCloake and find more about his books and writing at www.martincloake.com